Zara Raquel's Journey at UNDP Kigali, Rwanda: Tips to Protect Yourself Against Robbery (Satire)

Written by Zara Raquel

Hello again and welcome to my second blog! If you didn’t read my first blog 5 ways to live your feminist life abroad, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Zara and I’m a Canadian/Spanish graduate student who is currently interning for the United Nations Development Programme in Kigali, Rwanda. Nice to meet you!

In this post, I’d like to share my experience of being robbed. This story has a happy ending since I got my things back, but the lessons I learned will stay with me forever.

Before we begin, a little disclaimer: this blog is meant to be a parody of popular “victim blaming” rhetoric, frequently ascribed to female-presenting survivors of assault. In no way do I wish to trivialize survivors’ experiences. Rather, my aim is to shine a spotlight on the absurdity and inaccuracy of victim blaming. In addition, I would like to emphasize that my experience of robbery is a common one found in every major city around the world. This should not deter anyone from visiting Kigali (which is an extremely safe, clean and inviting city).

Without further ado, here is the story of my robbery, accompanied by tips to protect yourself against robbery.

Story

My story takes place on a Wednesday night, around 9:30 in the evening. I was hanging out with friends, enjoying dinner and conversation, when I decided it was time to walk home. My walk home is short— approximately ten minutes. I was walking down one of the thousand hills in the city when I noticed a moto driver pull into a nearby driveway, where he stopped. I assumed he was simply resting after a long day of driving people around the city. As I walked by the man, he revved up his moto, grabbed ahold of my purse and pulled, hard. The faux leather purse straps across my body were ripped apart and my purse left with the man.

I was stunned. I carried everything in that purse: house keys, money, credit card, drivers’ license, cellphone and more. Fortunately, my friend who accompanied me sprung to action, chasing the moto driver down, ultimately getting my purse back.  Here is what I learnt from this experience.

1. Walk alone

My friend insisted on accompanying me home. While I appreciated the gesture, I declined his offer as he was recovering from typhoid at the time. He came anyway. My would-be robbery may never have happened had I simply walked home alone instead of allowing a man to escort me. This experience has taught me that men attract a lot of trouble! 

2. Be intoxicated

I blame my dislike of alcohol for this. At the aforementioned dinner party, I drank water and Coke Zero. Instead, I should have been more responsible and accepted the peach vodka offered to me. My complete sobriety allowed me to experience and remember this near-robbery in excruciating detail—a problem that intoxication would have solved!

3. Wear tight and revealing clothing

I love wearing tight clothing that accentuates certain parts of my body. There’s nothing wrong with that! Unfortunately, on the night in question, I wore a pair of baggy basketball shorts, an old t-shirt and a pair of black flats. I had no makeup on and my hair was a beehive on top of my head. I suppose my sloppy appearance and lack of effort led the perpetrator to believe I was wealthy enough to rob!

4. Stay out late

The attempted robbery took place before any reasonable adult would go to bed. There were guards inside each home’s gate, mingling guests outside the hotel I was passing by, and people in cars driving past the location of the incident. Perhaps, had I stayed out late and walked home after midnight, there wouldn’t have been any moto drivers on the road to rob me!

Wrap up

Though my experience ended on a positive note, it was still jarring. Afterwards, I reflected on what I did to attract this negative attention and whether I could have prevented it. This is what inspired me to write this article.

It is my belief that women, particularly those who are marginalized by their sexuality, racialized status, disability and so much more, are taught to question how their (in)actions attract violence and unwanted sexual attention.

The truth is that predators choose to attack whether or not you are alone, irrespective of the amount of makeup you wear, despite your running shoes or stilettoes, and regardless of your sobriety.

Harmful actions are the sole responsibility of those that commit them.

Attempting to limit your vulnerability to violence is, of course, smart, but we are never immune. Due to the current world order, there are some people who increase their risk of violence simply by existing. For instance, the violence perpetrated against trans women is frequently overlooked as “deserved” or “called-for”.

So, the next time a friend or family member tells you that they experienced violence, don’t ask them about the length of their skirt or how many drinks they had. #stopvictimblaming